Things We Can Learn From THE EUROPEAN WAY OF LIVING
There’s no denying that the Americans and the Europeans just do things differently (every culture does, but just generalizing right now).
I’m half Japanese, half Austrian, and grew up in New York, which means I always had one foot in Asia, one foot in Europe, and a few other limbs in America. Growing up, my summers and winters were spent in Japan or Austria, and thus there’s a never-ending pull on my heartstrings that repeatedly brings me to these countries. When New York gets too much, I run away. Two years ago it was to Paris, last year to Lisbon, and this year to parts of Germany and Austria. Each visit refills my mind body and soul after it’s been drained by the hustle and bustle that is America. I could be doing the same work, the same amount of hours with the same people, and feel much more calm doing it in Lisbon than in New York. Why is this the case though? What about the European lifestyle is so much more relaxing and rejuvenating? Why is peace so much easier to find there, than it is here? I’ve decided to break it down here, and list out a few things we can learn from the European lifestyle. Many things are simply systematic or political, and therefore out of our control. But the things we can incorporate into our day to day lives, I’ve written out below, so that we may all find a little more peace and calm.
Valuing taking breaks and leisure-time
The other day I sat across an Austrian family friend, who exclaimed he is trying to retire but is required by law to fulfill his mandatory 48 vacation days first. That’s 48, on top of the ones he has already taken. We have no such thing as mandatory vacation in America, because we are not seen as people in need of rest and rejuvenation, but merely hands that need to do work for businesses. In Europe, it is rare that anyone ever stays past 5:00PM at work, and if you tell someone you work through your lunch break they will stare at you with wide eyes and wonder. They truly work to live and not live to work. It’s difficult therefore, in a society that does the exact opposite, to not only decide to take breaks for yourself, but to not be affected by the constant stress of the people around you. But if you’re committed to uprooting your lifestyle, then it is vital to shift your gaze from the screen and eat outside, close the laptop after 5:00, sit at a café and do absolutely nothing. You don’t have to do like the Italians and take a two hour Aperol Spritz break just to log off at 4:00 again, but a little rest will do you good. You are not a machine, you require more tender love and care than the laptop you gift all your attention to.
Looking out for one another
Living in America, I get the overwhelming sensation that everyone must fend for themselves. Survive or be killed, it seems, like it’s a constant battle just to exist. It’s woven into the fabric of America — you fund your own health insurance, education, pension, etc. Of course, there are perks to living a hyper-independent lifestyle. You get more control of your own fate, for example, or have a wider range of possible outcomes. But then you spend a few months across the ocean and are amazed at how well everything just works. Sick? Pop into the doctors, no questions asked and no burden on your wallet. Difficult times might land you on the streets? No worries, there’s a system to protect people from homelessness. Banks, insurances, customer service… they’re actually serving you… good? You don’t have to fight them? Blasphemy. It goes beyond just the country’s infrastructure, but this mindset is deeply woven into the hearts of its citizens, so that when you have a minor problem at your hands, your community swiftly swoops in to lend you a helping hand. It lifts a load of stress off of you you didn’t even know you were shouldering.
Not overthinking everything
The joke goes: How many Germans does it take to fix a lightbulb? One, because they are efficient and have no sense of humor. Heehee and hawhaws aside, there is a point to be made here. I feel like there is never much fuss to get from point A to point B with the Europeans. Many things are very matter of factual, straightforward, what you see is what you get, kind of vibe. A great example of this is in romance. If you like each other, you show it, you get together, done. You don’t really hurt each other (generally speaking), because why do that to someone you love? Whereas here, I often hear people wondering “well he’s giving me mixed signals! What does this text mean? Should I do X Y and Z to get him to do A B and C?” To which I respond, why don’t you just ask him…? Or, girl if he was interested, he’d show it, if you’re confused, he’s not interested. The game of love is very much that, a game, and I find it rather cumbersome. The Europeans see a problem, think of a solution, and put it in action. Whereas Americans tend to go in circles, make multiple arguments for different cases, discuss amongst friends, delay a solution, and still land at some questionable destination. I’m very much guilty of this as well, and need to work on becoming more swift and straightforward with how I handle things. A trick I’ve learned is to simply distance my emotional attachment from the problem, and look at everything logically. From there, it’s much easier to take a step forward in the right direction.